I Really Should Be Sleeping

I have an early morning ahead of me, and I really should be asleep.  It is true that we make time to do what we really want to do.  Even when our days are long and full, if we really want it, we can squeeze out a few minutes for those things we are most passionate about.  Apparently I am passionate about Words with Friends.  I find time to play WWF everyday ☺!

Back in January I had some high hopes and opened my big mouth and boldly declared that I would have a rough draft of a book ready by my birthday - HA!  September seemed like a  l  o  o  o  o  o n g  way off.  It was not. I was wrong. It was an incredibly short span of time, and I was totally ridiculous, and overly optimistic to think that I could produce anything remotely like a manuscript in less than 9 months.  Crazy talk. 

My birthday came and went.  It was a great day, I felt loved, but no book was written.  No outline, no draft, no nothing, zip ....

I have decided that, yes, I want to write a book, and no, I did not want to bad enough to actually do it in the last 9 months.  I have also decided that it is difficult, if not impossible, for me to schedule creativity.  I can't put, "be creative", on a to do list like, say, "go to the bank".  It just doesn't work.  I think what may work for me is to put things on my to do list that inspire creativity.  Rather than the actual task of creating, I need to schedule time to ponder, observe, experience new things, read, relax.  My daily lists need to include things like - hike, walk, watch the sunrise, watch the sunset, go to the beach, go to lunch with friends, read a book, take a class, study a subject.  When I do these things, my mind becomes more active and creativity flows.  When my creative mind is working, you can't stop me from writing.

Less Talk, More Do

I know it is February, and nearly the end of February at that.  January was just not the month for me to think deeply and make serious plans.  So, here I am in mid-February, formally stating my goals for the new year, which is already in progress.  So, better late than never, here are my goals for 2013. 

My theme for 2013 is, "Less Talk, More Do", pretty self explanatory. 

1.  Hike once a month.   Hiking makes me happy.  I love being outside, and seeing all the beauty of this island, particularly the things you cannot see from the road.  It feels great to make it to the top!  I also enjoy the conversations you can have while on the trail.  If you want to get to know someone, go hike a few miles with them.

2.  Become proficient at Hula.  When I dance, I feel joy.  Dancing Hula is a way of sharing that joy with others.  I am going to practice as much as necessary so that when I perform the audience sees the joy that I feel and are not distracted by the moves of a less than naturally graceful white girl. 

3. Read 50 books.  I need to read.  It keeps me entertained, and feeling connected to the world.  I love to learn new things, and reading is cheaper than tuition, and more flexible than going back to school.  Why 50?  It's more than I read last year, and I like a challenge.  It's slightly less than one book per week, and that seems completely possible to me, unless I get on another LOOOOOONG book kick, (ie. Atlas Shrugged, Middlemarch, Great Expectations, The Three Musketeers,  Don Quixote, etc.). 

Ok, here comes the big one, are you ready for it?  I saved the best for last.  If I say this out loud I am committed. 

4. Write my first book.  Yes, first, there will be more than one.  I will have a draft ready for the next step by my birthday.  I have been talking about this for too long, it's time to do it.  I have a desire, I have a goal, and I have a plan.  This is it, time to get serious.

Out of Sync

It's 3am .  I've been awake for over an hour.  Yesterday I was up at 4:30, and just stayed up.  By noon I was exhausted.  My sleep is all out of sync and I am most displeased.  Historically I am a good sleeper.  Throughout my life it is one thing that I am consistently good at.  I am still for about 2 minutes, and I am asleep for a good solid 8 to 10 hours.  I don't wake up, I don't toss and turn.  I just sleep.  Apparently not today, or yesterday.  I am hopefully for tomorrow.

I am awake and bored!  At this hour even my kids are home and asleep.  It is too early on the mainland for anyone to be awake.  It's not cool to call to chat at 7am on a Saturday.  Besides, I have to be quiet since everyone, including the dogs, are asleep at my house. The kitchen needs cleaning but I can't exactly go banging around the kitchen and wake everyone else up.  Only in the bathroom could I turn on the light and not bother anyone.  I'm bored, but I still don't feel like scrubbing toilets. I don't think it is possible for me to be THAT bored.  So, I sit here in the dark, at my desk, trying to type most quietly. 

 Lately I haven't felt like writing.  My blog posts with just a photo of a flower, and  a simple title are a good example.  My mind is not quiet, the deep thoughts are still there, just disorganized.  I start a sentence, and then I backspace and delete it all.  Words fail me.

My two constants, solid sleep and written expression are out of sync. 

I Don't Want to Be Grounded, or do I?

I was scolded yesterday for not posting a new blog in over a week. I was threatened with grounding, if I didn't have something up by tonight. I'm not sure just how Tif thinks she can ground me with several thousand miles and an ocean between us, but I don't like to get in trouble, so I am doing as I am told.

It has actually be over 2 weeks since I have posted anything new here. I am not sure why. I have been busy, but I'm always busy. That excuse just doesn't fly. My good friend Erin always says, "If you want something done, ask a busy person." She's right. Busy people know how to get things done.

I think maybe being grounded would be nice. If I had to stay at home, and even better, stay in my room, maybe I would actually make the time to write something. Maybe it would even be interesting, or creative. I would certainly sleep if I were grounded, and if I couldn't leave my room I wouldn't get distracted by the kitchen, and all it's demands, or even be able to do much work.

Well, Tif, here you go - not 1, but 2 posts for ya today!