The Path

"I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be."— Douglas Adams

 When I was 16, and knew everything, I had my whole life planned out.  Lucky for me, it turned out much differently. The all knowing genius of 16 quickly morphed into the uncertain young adult, and then the completely confused young mother.  Life has taken many more twists, turns and side roads than I had ever imagined.  My plan at 16 was pretty straight forward, and frankly, it would have been a boring life!


For the longest time I have felt like I was always behind schedule.  Each day seemed to present more urgent tasks than I had time or energy to complete.  Each week, each month, each year, I was getting more and more behind.  Instead of getting closer to reaching my goals, I seemed to be getting further off track.  The trouble is, I was still judging myself based on that plan I made when I was 16.  The plan that didn't allow for real life to happen.


Looking at my life's path from a starting point of age 16 I see the straight path with the big gold star at the end.  That path is empty, it's so faint it is barely even visible. My actual life's path starts in the same place and for a short distance follows that path.  About 19 it makes a pretty abrupt turn and then proceeds to curve and wind around in a generally forward motion.  Sometimes it turns back on itself, like one of those mazes with only one tiny way out.  There are long stretches where the road is straight and clear, but right up the side of a mountain.  To see the original gold star I have to look back and to my left.  Apparently, I left that mile marker in the dust long ago.  Imagine that, all this time I felt like I was behind schedule, when actually I am way ahead.  When I look back, my path is sprinkled liberally with big gold stars.  What lies ahead of me shines even brighter, thousands of gold stars and a big cup running over with light.